1 Year Wellness Appointment

K and I saw our favorite nurse practitioner, Nancy, for our wellness appointment the other day. Since our last appointment 4 months ago, K has gained only a bit over a pound and didn't grow much either. The nurse wasn't concerned. I guess I have to get used to the idea that K will not ALWAYS be growing with the speed she used to.

Heightwise K is at the 75th percentile, weightwise at 50th, and her head is still off the chart.

CIO

I did it. Because of exhaustion and desperation, I used the CRY IT OUT method to help K and us sleep through the night. So far so good.

Before going into details, I'd like to explain that I'm against the method. If K wasn't cooperating, I'd never let her cry for (let's say) too long. But 2 days ago after having had to get up almost every hour for a few nights, I got to the point where I couldn't do it anymore and at the same time be functional during the day (I started working a couple of weeks ago and am teaching a few hours 5 days a week).

So, after talking to some friends who have done IT, I decided it was time. And yes, I said "I"; Len was skeptical, but since he's not the one who gets up at night, we agreed it would be best for him to sleep in another room and let IT happen.

The goal was to let K cry for 10 minutes, then if she didn't stop on her won, I'd go to nurse her. My hope was that she would stop crying and fall asleep before my getting up. It worked!!! The most important part of it is that K never cried for longer than a minute. I was ready for changes, but I was afraid of those 10 minutes. Thank goodness, I didn't have to face them.

We've done only 2 nights so far, and within that time I nursed only twice at night. K keeps waking up every 2 hours or so , but after 20 seconds of fussing falls back to sleep. The first night I "ignored" her (oh, this sounds HORRIBLE) about 5 times, last night only twice. Supposedly this method takes a week for babies to learn to sleep through the night.

I'm planning on getting up twice every night to nurse unless K doesn't wake up at night at all. I want to continue nursing as long as I can and as long as K needs it even if it's at night. Getting up twice every night sounds perfectly doable to me. Even though it's been only two nights, I'm feeling alive again. I have much more energy during the day, and everything seems to make sense again.

I felt guilty for not responding to my baby's cry, and after the first night, I was afraid to look straight into K's eyes thinking: Is she going to hate me for this? Not only did K sleep until 9am for two nights in a row, but she's been welcoming me with a big smile in the morning. I'm thinking she either forgot what happened at night, or she appreciates it.

UPDATE on the 3rd night:

K woke up only twice last night. After nursing she went back to sleep and didn't get up until 9am this morning. CIO definitely works for us!!!

Night 4: K was fed at midnight; then she woke up a few times between 3-4 but was ignored. She got fed at 4 and slept 'til 8 in the morning.

Night 5: K was fed at midnight. She woke up at around 3 fell back asleep and slept until 7!

Night 6: It's been the worst night so far (since starting the CIO). After eating at midnight, K woke up 3 times between 2-3 am and cried for 5 minutes each time. This time she actually shed some tears, and it was the hardest thing not to respond to her cry. After 5 minutes of crying she fell back asleep to be awaken in about 20 minutes. The whole thing left me awake for another hour where I couldn't stop thinking "is it worth it?" After falling asleep at 3, she didn't wake up until 6am to be fed and then at 8 to get up.

Night 7: This is it - the last night of training. K reached her goal. She woke up at midnight and at 4 to be fed and fell back asleep. We both woke up at 8 - rested and happy.

Politically Correct

Our apartment complex organized this year the Holiday Tree Removal for its residents.

It sounded OK to me until someone crossed out the word Holiday and wrote with big red letters Christmas above it.

I understand how for instance Jewish people may be fed up hearing Merry Christmas over and over again especially if they don't celebrate it, but Christmas tree should be a Christmas tree, no?

Blueberries

It used to be bananas; now, it's the blueberries.

If K is not willing to eat something whether it's her Super Porridge meal or simply mixed veggies, she will be more than happy to shovel that in if topped with a half of a blueberry.

The New Year and Its Firsts

January 1 - K for the first time on her 4s. (She didn't crawl or anything, just got on her fours for the first time; before she was unable to hold her butt up and would end up on her belly)

January 2 - K stood up on her own when holding onto the couch.

Pumping

The fall semester is coming to an end and with that all my milk pumping and what goes with that - humiliation. This semester I've taught at 3 different schools but pumped at 2.

When the classes started, I thought it would be appropriate to be honest with the janitors and explain once for all why I needed an extra room with no windows but a power outlet open every night for 15 minutes. These weren't the conversations I was looking forward to, but went well, and I was happy when I was done with them.

Pumping itself was never a problem. Time sometimes was limited, but I followed my friend's advice of not feeling guilty for making students wait a few minutes. I was producing the best food there was for my baby goose after all.

One thing I didn't realize was that the janitors take a night off every now and then and have subs. Subs, just like the regular janitors, are always male and most of the time understand English. However I did notice a pattern: their English worsens when I get to the pumping part of the room opening request. If they understand what kind of pumping I'm talking about they usually get embarrassed which makes me feel very uncomfortable. If they don't, then I get embarrassed. As an ESL teacher I try my best to help them understand what it is I do behind those close doors, and to answer their question: "You do what?" - I provide many details and unconsciously use body language. So, I catch myself touching my boobs each time I use the word 'pump', which only makes the whole situation worse.

Last night, there was a sub janitor at one of my schools again. I explained again that I'm a new mom and my baby is at home, but I have to be able to feed her, so I have to pump. After watching me touch my boobs (again), poor guy turned around and opened the first door there was. So I was placed at the library (with windows). And, because it's a winter time, it gets dark outside early; at 8 pm, it's pitch black. even though the windows have blinds, because of the light inside, one can still see what's going on the inside with just little effort.

Trying not to think about the light and windows, I found an outlet, got my bottles ready and right before attaching the pump, I heard a knock on the door. Hoping that whoever was there would just leave, I took a deep breath and tried not to be bothered.

The little boy's voice wasn't letting it go.
Boy: Open up! I can see you're inside!
Kate: The library is closed!
Boy: Open up!
Kate: No!
Boy: Open up. My mom works here; I have to drop something off.

So, I covered my equipment, pulled my shirt down, opened the door to be pushed away by two little guys who obviously had a mission to accomplish. Whatever they were doing took about 5 minutes, and they were on their way out.

So, everything worked out great. I went back to my food producing activity, did my business and was back in the classroom in 10 minutes. It seems like not a big deal, but I'll be very happy when I don't have to deal with situations like this any more. I bet the janitors will be happy, too.

We're Back

We are back from our cruise! More details to follow. The cruise was more than great although K got sick right at the end, and when we returned home, I took over the bug. K was fine within a couple of days, and I am still on antibiotics but feeling much much better.

Right after Christmas our computer was down, so here are some posts from the month of December.