CIO

I did it. Because of exhaustion and desperation, I used the CRY IT OUT method to help K and us sleep through the night. So far so good.

Before going into details, I'd like to explain that I'm against the method. If K wasn't cooperating, I'd never let her cry for (let's say) too long. But 2 days ago after having had to get up almost every hour for a few nights, I got to the point where I couldn't do it anymore and at the same time be functional during the day (I started working a couple of weeks ago and am teaching a few hours 5 days a week).

So, after talking to some friends who have done IT, I decided it was time. And yes, I said "I"; Len was skeptical, but since he's not the one who gets up at night, we agreed it would be best for him to sleep in another room and let IT happen.

The goal was to let K cry for 10 minutes, then if she didn't stop on her won, I'd go to nurse her. My hope was that she would stop crying and fall asleep before my getting up. It worked!!! The most important part of it is that K never cried for longer than a minute. I was ready for changes, but I was afraid of those 10 minutes. Thank goodness, I didn't have to face them.

We've done only 2 nights so far, and within that time I nursed only twice at night. K keeps waking up every 2 hours or so , but after 20 seconds of fussing falls back to sleep. The first night I "ignored" her (oh, this sounds HORRIBLE) about 5 times, last night only twice. Supposedly this method takes a week for babies to learn to sleep through the night.

I'm planning on getting up twice every night to nurse unless K doesn't wake up at night at all. I want to continue nursing as long as I can and as long as K needs it even if it's at night. Getting up twice every night sounds perfectly doable to me. Even though it's been only two nights, I'm feeling alive again. I have much more energy during the day, and everything seems to make sense again.

I felt guilty for not responding to my baby's cry, and after the first night, I was afraid to look straight into K's eyes thinking: Is she going to hate me for this? Not only did K sleep until 9am for two nights in a row, but she's been welcoming me with a big smile in the morning. I'm thinking she either forgot what happened at night, or she appreciates it.

UPDATE on the 3rd night:

K woke up only twice last night. After nursing she went back to sleep and didn't get up until 9am this morning. CIO definitely works for us!!!

Night 4: K was fed at midnight; then she woke up a few times between 3-4 but was ignored. She got fed at 4 and slept 'til 8 in the morning.

Night 5: K was fed at midnight. She woke up at around 3 fell back asleep and slept until 7!

Night 6: It's been the worst night so far (since starting the CIO). After eating at midnight, K woke up 3 times between 2-3 am and cried for 5 minutes each time. This time she actually shed some tears, and it was the hardest thing not to respond to her cry. After 5 minutes of crying she fell back asleep to be awaken in about 20 minutes. The whole thing left me awake for another hour where I couldn't stop thinking "is it worth it?" After falling asleep at 3, she didn't wake up until 6am to be fed and then at 8 to get up.

Night 7: This is it - the last night of training. K reached her goal. She woke up at midnight and at 4 to be fed and fell back asleep. We both woke up at 8 - rested and happy.